Entry Note To Self:...Confidence

Journal Entry 1/7/18
I wrote this a while back about a good friend and a good man...think of you often TK. Especially when I see an old barn...
__________________________________________________________________
The Old Barn
_________________________________

”If you are coming from the south, turn right at the only red light in Hornbeck. Go over the railroad tracks and take the fork to the left. Drive until the black top turns to gravel and dirt. Oh, in about two miles you will come to some dogs laying in the road. Make your way through the dogs and take the first dirt lane on the left. As you round the curve you will see my house down in the pasture. You will find me in the old barn” ...

TK, they call him. He lives to the north side of Hornbeck. When I went to visit TK on my last trip into that part of the world, he gave me those directions to find his house;

Sure enough, he was in the barn grooming a skinny ole paint horse he had just rescued from the grips of Horse Heaven.

I've known TK all my living days. We played in the woods, made pine top forts, explored small ponds and even double dated sisters on one occasion when we were still wet behind the ears and did not know what a date was...

TK could write a dissertation on the Game Of Dominoes, simply because he claims to be the world's foremost expert on the fine art of the game. Said the only time he loses a game is when he has to donate a game for the aid of personal pity or use it as a long range strategy.

Tall and spry, dressed in faded Big Mac overalls with a loud welcome of, ”​look what the cats dragged in; see you found the dogs in the road!" ​

He is always quick with a joke and a philosophy on just about any subject you can conjure up. I don't even know how we got off on the subject of Dominoes. Never my intention. I only wanted a pint of his famous corn whiskey. It may have been the sampling from the pint mason jar that lead us in that direction? Not sure, but he tasted it first, said he wanted to make sure it was still good. Guess it was still good, as he passed it over to me for my liking. Yep, it was that sampling that begged my first question:

”​Is it true TK, that you are the best Domino player in the world?"

”Y no," he said. ”But I beat the hell out of the best that said they was."_​

Domino is a good game. A game of skill. I would say it is about 10 percent luck. It requires a lot of concentration, thought, and just plan smart ass grit. Not like golf or chess where silence is required of spectators and competitors alike. A good player must shake off any heckling remarks. A Domino player has much more on his mind. He is working on his style of play.

TK for example said he played with an Amateur Style. As he describes it; _”A​ mateurs play not knowing their next play. Just random, not following any expected strategy. It makes my competitors try and figure out what I'm going to do next. I know, if I don't know, then they couldn't know either.​“ See how the moonshine brings out the best in logic?


TK plays most mornings at Hoot's Barber Shop. I spotted it as I crossed over the railroad tracks back in city limits of Hornbeck. A gathering spot of the towns finest men, doing their part to keep the moral and social fabric of Hornbeck alive. A lot of social bonding of sorts, and way to many lies being exchanged. They call it therapy and gossip . I call it a reason to get out of the house.

I always thought it would be great to host a live daily radio broadcast from Hoots Barber Shop at the time of these gatherings. Maybe sell cassette recordings of the Therapy sessions...

There was an old straight back chair leaning against the barn wall. TK introduced the chair as, ”the retired in honor chair, of old man Pete Alford.”

As the story goes, Pete sat on that chair every Friday morning for twelve years, in this barn to best TK's Amateur Style.

”Alford was a nice feller, a fine upstanding citizen and looked reasonably good in his clothes for a man of his age. He just didn't understand the game of Dominoes very well." TK continues to spout, ”I feel it is my duty to report that I beat him sober, not so sober, whittling whist I whistled, and even left handed. Beat him four out of five times when we played...well maybe three out of four." As he looked up and grinned. ”A​lford retired from Dominos in 1997 the same year the chair retired. The shame of it all.”

TK is known for his, Wisecracking Psychology game strategy, when he wants to humiliate his opponents and destroy their confidence. Here are a few techniques he shared with me:

Laugh-as if you didn't intend to, while your opponent is studying the board. Play fast for those that ponder and hesitate. Ponder and hesitate for those who play fast. After you choose your rock to be played, pause with your arm in midair, purse your lips as in thought then lay it ever so softly on the table. Each time after you win, idly say to your opponent, "one day I sure would like to know why you played that way." This implies stupidity and gives them something to think about. Before you begin each game, let your opponents know that 50% of your foes seek mental health counseling after playing you. Never appear to doubt the tale of your opponents, no matter how improbable. Except for Champions, and they have no need to gild the lily. They all are liars and braggarts. Smile, nod, and politely mumur as your opponent tells of humiliating ole Joe or Bob. Just say in admiration. "Gee Pete, you must have been really good...back then...gimme twenty-five."


We even played a game or two. After getting soundly whooped, I commented to him that I wished I were a good Domino player. He quipped, ”Y​ep, I wish you was too."

You see, the Game of Dominoes is just like life. Confidence is no problem...keeping it is...

Be well, play your doubles when you can and always take the dirt Lane past the dogs in the road. It leads you to the ole barn. You just might enjoy an afternoon therapy session with an old friend...a pint of good moonshine and much more...Doc

From Inside The Sane Asylum...theatre of being ridiculous

Conversation Between Dr. Ego And Jess B. Rambling
The Théâtre Of Being Rediculous

Jess: What are we doing out here in the dark?

Doc: We are not in the dark. We are in the waning crescent of the September new moon.

Jess: I hope this is not another fine mess you are getting me into!

Doc: My oh my, Jess. You still sound upset from our August full moon conversation?

Jess: Well, Chuckles, did accuse us of being out of phase and only mildly amusing.

Doc: You can’t take what Chuckles says to heart. He thinks the New Moon is actually another Moon and that the far side of the moon is dark. This is a time for letting go of those perturbations.

Jess: My perturbations?

Doc: You know what I mean Jess. Those periods of confusion that destroy your ego. This New Moon is a time of calm and reflection. A time to gather your thoughts on new possibilities and what can be.

Jess: You mean like burning herbs and taking a bath in essential oils?

Doc: Exactly! Besides, we have seen Chuckles out of focus, and that’s much more amusing than being out of phase.

Jess: Do you remember the time Chuckles felt ill and you took his temperature with an outside barometer?

Doc: Yeah, he registered wet and windy. Why did you call a veterinarian to see him?

Jess: Well I didn’t think religion made any difference. And besides Chuckles’ perturbations usually are wet, windy, & out of focus. He’s F Stop is off.

Doc: Hey Jess, do you think Doda’s F Stop is on automatic?

Jess: Do you think the Moon has it’s own time zone?

Doc: Do you ever just stop and think how grand life is here inside The Sane Asylum?

A two clown collaboration...is a collaboration between friends making light of their mutual friends. Partly truth, partly fiction but mostly just made up shit...make peace with yourself and get along with it all...Doc

From Inside The Sane Asylum...August Full Moon

Conversation between Dr Ego and Jess B. Rambling 

Jess: Doc, I know we are here again to discuss your recent

 research on the full moon.  Do you ever research the

 rising of the Sun?

 Doc: Hell no Jess. I never get up that early. That’s the

 work of research assistants. Maybe you would be interested that

 career path?

 Jess: Do you expect me to give up doing nothing to do

 something else?

 Doc: Well, a point well taken Jess. I guess you can’t

 quit something you never started?

Jess: I know some people think I’m lazy. They just don’t

 know I’m on energy saving mode.

_Silence_

 Jess: That reminds me Doc. Not long ago you told me my

 “give a s**ter” was in remission. Recently I almost gave

 a damn about something.

Doc: And how did that make you feel?

Jess: It scared the the hell out of me. Fear is real! It’s like your falling apart.

Doc: Well, the good news is that nothing can fall apart if

 it has never been together.

Jess: Yeah, I walk around like I have it all together, but

 deep down inside of my shoe, my sock is sliding off.

 Doc: Jess, you are the reason they have to put directions on shampoo bottles.

_Long Pause_

Jess: Doc, when we stand here and ponder the moon, do you think about how mysterious the creation was?

Doc: Yeah, I always think about how God created man first, then how he came up with a better idea.

 Jess: When you say things like that I don’t like standing this close to you.

Doc: Well you do know that if I get to meet St. Peter before you, I’m going to blame all my short comings as your ideas.

_Silent Pause_

Doc: Since we are standing here in the Waxing Gibbous Of The August Moon, we should discuss your Moon Flow for this month.

Jess: My Moon Flow?

Doc: Now Jess, listen carefully.  This month the Moon is in Pisces and you won’t be flooding your journal with feelings but you will channel the energy into “to do” list. We are finished with retrograde eclipse with multiple planets and you want feel sluggish anymore. You can now get into magic, imagination and romanticism. Maybe even indulge in brief encounters with other humans. Don’t even be surprised if you feel the urge to skip down the street like you are in a Disney movie.

Jess: Doc, could you just please go normal for a while?

_Long Silence_

Doc: They say if you look at the full moon over your right shoulder, you will be more humble? 

_Pause_

Doc: What do you think people do with all the time they save by typing k instead of ok?

Jess: Doc, your brain has too many tabs open!

Doc: Have you ever noticed how words that start with a “G” are awkward & seldom used. Some times the “G” is silent as in gnaw. I like “g” words. I prefer to pronounce the “g” in “gnaw”. It comes out ganaw. That makes me guffaw while sounding like I was educated near Zwolle or Ebarb. 

Jess: I had an Uncle who could not pronounce “gigantic” properly. For him it came out “guy-jantic”. Is there such a thing as Audio Dyslexia? Even worse, I think I “caught it” from him. I now have to pause before saying the word.

Doc: Did I ever tell you I am afraid of widths?

Jess: No you have not Doc. And did I ever tell you I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me? Better still, why don’t you go for a jog?

Doc: The first time I see a jogger smiling, I will consider it.

A Two Clown Collaboration...

From The Far Side of The Glass...what remains?

Journal Entry: 7/21/18
From The Far Side Of The Glass
тяєαт єα¢h ℓιттℓє α¢т ℓιкє α ѕα¢яαмєит σf кιи∂иєѕѕ

Death. Destruction. Chaos.
All before my morning coffee has even kicked in!!
How do you cope in a world where every time you look at a headline it tells of a new disaster? How do you manage not to lose empathy, stay focused, and continue to fight the good fight?

The underlying world order is not like this; and often the news emphasizes the worst of humankind to us. For every terrible thing you read/see/hear make a point to do one good thing in the world. Even if it means just noticing a flower blooming, smiling at a passing child, or holding the door open for someone.

Our worlds are made up of these small, tiny acts of kindnesses and each one will bring you closer to leading the kind of life you want. Treat each little act like a sacrament of kindness, or nurturing to yourself and focus on it. Only when we begin to do these things can we truly make a change in our world.

We often speak of “tiny acts of kindness” as a duty that we have to others. And while that’s true, it’s maybe truer that these acts keep us sane. They keep us in touch with what is best in us. They keep us grounded, humble, empathic, warm, and giving. They put smiles on our faces for the right reasons. Not the sneering grin of victory, but a gentle happiness that we feel because we are at home in the world. Not above, not below, but beside. They remind us what matters most. Not politics, economics, scandal, or outrage. But all that is right before our eyes. Life, love, beauty, goodness, and truth...Doc

Entry Note To Self...moments of joy

Journal Entry: 7/7/18
Happiness is nothing more than the feeling of joyful moments, spread over a longer period of time.

Those moments...a rainbow that turns your head. Fireworks, even if you don’t know what your celebrating. Ice cream, with chocolate drizzle. A crazy walk in the rain. That moment you "let go" not to regret the past, but to grow and live for the future. The smell of rain in May. Love letters written in the sand. When you practice gratitude, sense unexpected beauty, or in that moment when we truly experience forgiveness.

Those moments that take me by surprise. I do not seize them, they seize me.

And what does it take to capture a moment of joy? Not much. And what does it take to create a moment of joy? Not much.

So happiness for me is nothing more than little moments of joy that spread themselves over a longer period of time. And for all the moments in between? Well, I wait for It’s return...Doc

Entry Note To Self...short pants

Journal Entry: 7/27/18
sʜᴏʀᴛ ᴘᴀɴᴛs


I was having a cup of coffee this morning in a small brew house in Hot Springs. A beautiful little town with magic water to cure most all of one’s ills, except maybe a broken heart.

Across the way I see this unusual looking fellow. He was dancing all alone in ᴀ small green area, near the hot water as it flowed up from the magic springs, with it moist vapor rising through the air. He wore a tall hat and suspenders that held up his pants that were way to short for him.

He reminded me of a boy named Billy Ray back in the seventh grade. Billy Ray was unusual looking. He also wore pants that were to short for him, and his glasses were always crooked. Anytime Billy Ray was around, you could hear someone say, “Straighten your glasses Billy Ray.” Each time our English teacher asked Billy Ray to read his essay, she would always say, “Straighten your glasses Billy Ray.” Billy Ray would get up to bat and the coach yelled, “Straighten up your glasses, Billy Ray!” We later found out that his glasses were not crooked, he just had one ear that was lower than the other. Or maybe it was one higher than the other?

Billy Ray had an unusual tone when he spoke. Kinda through his nose and he accented all his “t’s”. Especially if a word ended in a t.

Well, all of that is beside the point. Billy Ray, like the rest of us, was headed into the seventh grade and back in my days that was one of those milestone years. As 7th grade boys we had no idea that when we walked in the door on the first day of school, we would be met with a veritable wall of full on breast, as grown by our female counterparts, over the summer.

There’s really nothing a person could have done to adequately prepared us. Even if “they” would have told us, we would have still been just as mystified, helpless and bumbling. With just the sheer volume alone, I’m not quiet sure why we did not lose consciousness or have to be sent home?

I remember hearing the nazzle tone words of Billy Ray as we stepped through the hallway door...”Did you see the TiTTies on Mary Ann?”

Billy Ray was getting so carried away that we had to tell him not to be saying those things and don’t directly look at them full on, because it would make him explode.

Well, anyway that’s my recollection of the story of Billy Ray as I watch this unusual looking man with a tall hat, short pants, dancing with himself...enjoy your day! Doc