From Inside The Sane Asylum...A personal matter.
The wisest person could ask no more of Fate
Than to be simple, modest, brave, true,
Safe from the many, honored by the few;
To count as naught in world, or church, or state;
But inwardly in secret to be great.
James Russell Lowell
My grandfather was quiet a character. I think about his character often as I have done throughout my long life. What makes character? What is that "thing" that defines another? As I think back, I never saw my grandfather out of control and never heard him complain. Mostly saw a grin on his face. One of those S--- Eating Grins. If you know what I mean?
Never really saw him sad but once. The day I went into his hospital room and told him that the funeral service for my grandmother was beautiful. Small tear ran down the corner of his left eye. They were married for over seventy-five years. He died two months after her death. "Nothing more to tend" as he expressed.
He always greeted others with a crazy comment about life. Usually a little cynical in tone. "Did it to get a rise out them," he would say. It was his way to engage in conservation. Before the conversation was over, he would always turn to story telling. Some with a lie or two just to give them their money's worth. He never cheated a man, even in a good story.
I went into town with him one day and as he stepped off the curb, a young man in a truck almost hit him. The young man slammed on his breaks and yelled, "watch out!". My grandfather yelled the reply, "why you coming back?" Funny old man. He could never remember all the grandkids names so he just called us some critter from nature. Horsefly, horse collar, jack rabbit or even bumblebee comes to mind. I have always defined his character as a man who seemed to have made peace with himself and just got along with it all... Well it seemed that way to me.
Character. It's a noun. Stands on it own. The mental and moral qualities distinctive to an individual.
That is a nice sentence. Character traits are all the aspects of a person's behavior and attitudes that make up that person's personality. Everyone has character traits, both good and bad. Even characters in books have character traits. Character traits are often shown with descriptive adjectives and idioms like, chip off the ole block, fuddy duddy, sour puss or just plain deadwood. I tend to favor descriptive phrases like, he didn't give two hoots and a holler about what you thought. Or, his daddy didn't raise no fool.
Ever given much thought to what your descriptive phrase might be? It's kinda like being asked what's your sign. I always just say my sign says "slippery when wet." Now a phrase about your character needs to be more serious. One of those with Socrates qualities of moral character. "He had a disposition to behave in the right manner." That may have been Aristotle? But a good example. It has a moral virtue kinda tone. Moral virtue requires habit and practice. I had a habit of playing golf once, but found that practice was not proportional to getting better. At least in my case. Maybe the same for my moral virtue. We do have a tendency to practice our bad habits. Don't you think?
Listen, I'm not asking you to think about this as some grand deepening of your consciousness, I just needed something to write about, and one thing has lead to another until we got to this question. I think it's a personal matter to describe yourself in a single sentence, but I will give you a few examples. "She is a sad ole soul" or "he always aims at doing the right thing"...How about, "he was a cantankerous ole son of b----" and "It takes all kinds to make a world"...meaning different than most. I think you get the idea. Give it some thought. You just might land on a few descriptive adjectives that defines you well. Print it on a tee shirt and wear it around for all to see. It would kinda be like wearing your personality on your sleeve, so to speak.
I recall on my fiftieth birthday, my staff gave me a t-shirt that went something like this, " Therapy in progress, do not disturb any further." Still wear it around, as Therapy is still in progress. As you get older you will find you are not looking for something to wear on your sleeve but what will your tombstone wear? For me..."he has nothing more to say."
Wadsworth wrote a poem on character and described the nature of one as being, "such an odd, such a happy, kind creature as he." Maybe we won't become a limerick poem, or song, but surely we can try and just be a kind creature like he.
