Sunday, September 18, 2016

Jes B Rambling's Hallelujah Caravan...The Moral Of The Story

Jes...ONCE UPON A TIME THERE WAS A MAMA HORSEFLY, A PAPA HORSE-
FLY, AND A LITTLE BABY HORSEFLY. IT WAS NEARING SUPPERTIME,
AND THE FAMILY WAS LOOKING FOR SOMETHING TO EAT. AT THAT
MOMENT, THEY SPOTTED A FARM WITH HUNDREDS OF COWS IN THE
FIELD. THEY IMMEDIATELY FLEW INTO THE BRN, AND, BEHOLD!
IT WAS FILLED WITH TONS OF COW MANURE. THE HORSEFLIES
IMMEDIATELY STARTED EATING, AND THEY ATE AND ATE AND ATE
UNTIL THEY WERE SO FULL, THEY COULD NOT FLY AWAY. THEY HAD
TO GET OUT OF THE BARN BEFORE THE COWS CAME BACK, SO THE PAPA
HORSEFLY, SEEING A PITCHFORK STUCK INTO THE MAURE, SAID HE
WOULD CLIMB UP THE HANDLE AND TRY TO FLY AWAY FOR HELP.
HE CLIMBED UP THE HANDLE AND TRIED TO FLY AWAY, BUT HE WAS
SO HEAVY FROM EATING ALL THE COW MANURE, HE FELL DOWN AND
BROKE HIS NECK. THE MAMA HORSEFLY, WANTING TO SAVE HER
BABY, TRIED NEXT. BUT AFTER CLIMBING THE HANDLE AND TRYING
TO FLY AWAY, ALSO FELL DOWN AND BROKE HER NECK. THERE WAS
NOTHING FOR THE BABY HORSEFLY TO DO BUT TRY TO MAKE THE
ATTEMPT HIMSELF. BUT LIKE HIS MOTHER AND FATHER, HE WAS
SO FULL OF MANURE, HE FELL OFF THE HANDLE OF THE PITCH-
FORK AND BROKE HIS NECK. 

(PAUSE) 

Jes...DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS?
 DON'T FLY OFF THE HANDLE WHEN YOU'RE FULL OF SHIT.

Made Me Grin Series...a punny




THERE WAS AN INDIAN CHIEF NAMED SHORTCAKE. THE CHIEf WAS A BACHELOR, AND ONE DAY HE DECIDED TO GET MARRIED.
WELL, HE GOT MARRIED AND DIED ON HIS WEDDING NIGHT.
DO YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED THEN? SQUAW BURY SHORTCAKE....just punny. A little nonsense just went off in my brain...I will get better...sorry...:) Doc

Let Me Tell You A Story...James T. Callow's Folklore Archive


THE VIPER

ONE NIGHT A WOMAN WAS HOME ALL ALONE AND THE PHONE RANG.
SHE ANSWERED IT, AND A VERY WEIRD VOICE SAID, "I'M
THE VIPER AND I'M COMING TO YOUR HOUSE. I'M 3 MILES AWAY."
THE WOMAN WAS VERY FRIGHTENED, BUT NO ONE WOULD BELIEVE HER
ABOUT THIS PHONE CALL. THE NEXT NIGHT SHE ANSWERED THE
PHONE AGAIN AND THE SAME VOICE SAID, "I'M THE VIPER AND I'M
COMING TO YOUR HOUSE. I'M 2 MILES AWAY." AGAIN, NO ONE
BELIEVED HER. THE NEXT NIGHT HE CALLED AGAIN, AND SAID
"I'M THE VIPER AND I'M COMING TO YOUR HOUSE. I'M 1 MILE
AWAY. I'LL BE THERE TOMORROW." STILL NO ONE BELIEVED
HER. THE NEXT MORNING THERE WAS A TERRIBLE KNOCKING AT
THE DOOR. HER CURIOSITY OVERWHELMED HER AND SHE OPENED
THE DOOR. THERE STOOD A MAN WHO SAID, "I'M THE VINDA
VIPER, AND I COME TO VIPE YOUR VINDOWS."

Discovering Ourselves...wondering


I have no doubt that our thinking goes on for the most part without use of signs (words) and beyond that to a considerable degree unconsciously. For how, otherwise, should it happen that we sometimes “wonder” quite spontaneously about some experience? This “wondering” appears to occur when an experience comes into conflict with a world of concepts already sufficiently fixed within us. Whenever such a conflict is experienced sharply and intensely it reacts back upon our world of thought in a decisive way. The development of this world of thought is in a certain sense a continuous flight from “wonder.” 
A wonder of this kind I experienced as a child of four or five years when my father showed me a compass. That this needle behaved in such a determined way did not at all fit in the kind of occurrences that could find a place in the unconscious world of concepts (efficacy produced by direct “touch”). I can still remember — or at least believe I can remember — that this experience made a deep and lasting impression upon me. Something deeply hidden had to be behind things. AE



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