Conversation Between Dr. Ego Prozac and Jess. B. Rambling
July Full Moon
Jess: Doc, I can't join you to witness the July full moon. A family
matter requires that I do more than nothing for a change. My
cousin, Buck, showed up today and requires attention.
You remember him; the high strung one. He barged in and
announced that he needed sanctuary for a few days. I said,
"Buck, you're not an illegal immigrant. Why do you need
sanctuary?".
He tells me that he is quite anxious about the approaching Buck Moon and that I have to help him. I tell him, "It's just another full moon, full of lore as are most full moons".
He thinks it's much more than that. He's convinced he needs to
hide from this full moon because they've named it for him and
there is to be a lunar eclipse as well. I suggested that we find
him a cave, but he said he'd already checked on that. He claims
the nearest one, Blanchard Caves in central Arkansas, doesn't
allow visitors after dark.
I have him sedated for the time being and have ordered
blindfolds from Amazon Prime for the big evening so that he
won't witness the lunar eclipse of the Buck Moon. I don't trust
him to keep his eyes closed.
If we make it through the night, I'm going to let him borrow my
outfit and have convinced the local Jaycees to let him lead the
annual Watermelon Parade the next day. You know the old
adage, "When being run out of town, strut to the head of the line
and act like it's a parade".
PS...In one of his more lucid moments, Buck said he knew why
Dado had to change his name. Said it was because he seldom
had any Zippidy about him.
Doc: Jess... tell Buck not to worry. This dual thing is over
exaggerated. Mercury will be in retrograde so it want be as bad
as he thinks. You see, Mercury is a planet in space and
retrograde is a place in space that Mercury sometimes goes to.
It’s sort of a beta space, like a little embankment or like the out of
bounds area on a sports field. Mercury is still in space, but it’s in
retrograde, so, y’know, kind of on its heels. And since Mercury is
usually a really confident guy (planet), when he is feeling not his
best, it throws all of us off, too. It’s like Mercury is constipated or
has jock itch and we can’t look to him as our alpha, so we go
bananas. Then we catch ourselves being crazy and we go,
“Whup – Mercury must be in retrograde.” That is what “Mercury
in retrograde” means. I’m pretty sure.
I consulted Lady Jane, that psychic lady out on Hwy 80. You
know the one. You went in there one night in one of your rarest
moments. As I recall she ask you your name and you quickly
remarked, “I thought you were a psychic?”
Anyway, she suggested that Buck just tattoo open eyes on his
eyelids. That way it looks like he is awake when he is sleeping.
PS...If all fails, you could just have him change his name. Seemed to work for Dado (aka...Zippidy Do Da).
Two Clown Collaboration
Two Clown Collaboration
