Nuff Said...coping

How to Cope and Challenging Feelings

Challenging feelings can be extremely difficult, especially when adapting to change or a life transition, in comparison to changing thoughts and beliefs. Feeling states accumulate over a lifetime of experience, and, trying to change a feeling can seem like it is going against everything the person has ever believed in life. They have convinced themselves that what they feel is reasonable and must be a necessary part of life. We all have met someone who is chronically afraid, angry or sad, and characterize them in this way because their constant unpleasant mood states can be observed in most of their actions and behaviors. Negative feelings are the cumulative effects of experiences in life, and, the challenge is to accumulate new positive events to offset the negative. Because it takes time and effort to change these feelings people need to become open to the idea of wanting new, positive experiences and then invite them into their lives. These individuals must give themselves permission to allow these positive experiences to enhance their life. It is possible to change beliefs and thoughts with information and teaching; however, it is hard to change a feeling state without professional assistance. In fact, I once told my psychiatrist that I was hearing voices. He informed me I had no psychiatrist.

Nuff Said Series...beliefs

How to Cope and Challenge Beliefs

Challenging and changing a value or belief can be easier at times. The problem is people have thousands of ideas, and can only change one at a time, making this change a lengthy process. In order to challenge a belief, look at the evidence, examine the facts and then it may be easier for someone to change their mind about the conviction. For instance, some may assume that virgin wool is newly spun wool...when in fact, virgin wool comes from the sheep that run the fastest...

Front Porch Psychology...transitions

"The next levels of me, will demand a different me."

Many people are afraid of change. They prefer routine and stability, and, with any kind of transition this change disrupts self-confidence. Fear inhibits people from taking risks. When fear relates to a positive change, it usually is linked to a fear of not being able to achieve success. Some are overly concerned about not being capable “enough” or of being judged, as if dignity is only measured by their concept of success or winning.

Fear alerts us to danger. If people want to be able to cope well, they need to be open to the challenge of changing and questioning their thoughts, feelings and beliefs that they have in life. One way to confront an illogical fear is to pretend that the worse scenario happened and then backtrack in the mind to logically solve the problem. Even though, this technique is a fantasy, you are learning a new way to problem-solve.

One inevitable transition in life is associated with maturity or growing older, and this change usually brings with it an isolated sensation linked to a sense of loss to what was once in the past. With each passage people must learn new ways of adapting, and facing this new way of being in the world can be anxiety provoking because it tests our competence. To cope well with life, people will need to be open and at peace with questioning thoughts, feelings and beliefs about the world in which they live.

From The Road Series...the ghosts of N'awlins

The Ghosts of N'awlins

It felt as though the humidity itself
carried a hint of liquor as we walked
out into the night, wanting only to escape
our lives for a little.
Deep down in Vieux Carre’
twisted brass clashed with a piano
running half step from the crowded clubs
on Frenchman Street.
We filled our lungs with the city
and found her to be like certain kinds
of dangerous doses--
intoxicating.

The more we drank
the more I began to see glimpses
of the specters spoken of by locals.
They linger in my peripheral,
watching me with their sunken eyes.
You could faintly hear them moan,
only in defeated tones
and their collective scowl danced
in the heavy air of summer
as though it were a part from
all that jazz.

In the stranger hours of morn
I was approached by a ghost
a few blocks off Bourbon.
He offered up nothing but his dirty palms
in hopes of some false salvation.
I wrestled a dollar from my pocket
and passed it on to him,
only to watch him fruitlessly grasp at it
before it slide through his ghostly hands
to the ground below.
He looked down at the dollar
all helpless-like and he said
"It’s been slipping through my fingers
like dat for years now"

I walked from him, realizing then
why I had needed this trip,
because the only difference between
me and the ghosts of N'awlins
Was where I've been...

 Thanks Jonathan Potts for the inspiration...

Pick one...they all work!

Welcome your daily visitors...

I posted this one in the early infancy of The Sane Asylum. Think about it on occasions, especially when I find my self in a mood change. We all have them, hell I have three or four different moods a day. There are a few of mine that you may not want to see. What an ass I can be. Like my good friend Jess once said, "never fly off the handle when your full of shit." Well I do and then move on to the next stranger that strolls through my mind. Funny thing, they all do work. Some days it's like a theme park in my head. I know you think bull shit comes from bulls but encounter one of my bat shit raving spells and you will know you are wrong. Make no mistake, I always say what I mean, I just may not mean to say it out loud. Some days I just need to wear a sign, "don't upset me, I'm running out of places to hide the bodies." I recall a gift from my staff on my 50th birthday. It was a t shirt, on one side it read "therapy in progress..." the other side read "do not disturb any further." I need to find that shirt.

There are some days I wake up and say, "Life, I am finally happy today." Then life says, "Oh no we can't have that, let me throw in some misery and suffering." Wouldn't it be much easier if life just sent you a text saying, "today is going to suck." Some days every damn sad song you hear, you think they wrote the lyrics just for you. That sucks! As you get older there is a strange feeling that comes over you once in a while. It is that feeling you thought you forgot. Now that really sucks.

Let me ask you something...do you ever get tired of chasing your dreams? Well if you do, just ask them where they are going and catch up with them later. Life is really a grand adventure. Never easy, so we enroll in meditation classes that teach you how to breathe. Imagine that. Or go green, or buy you a yoga suit and mat, or maybe just get up each day and try to be the best person you can be. Knowing you may fall short at times but then there are other times that remind you of the beauty of humanity.

And there are those people in your life that think they know how you should act
 and be. Those you would like to say, "I didn't know you were an expert on running my life. Keep talking and let me take notes." It's your life. It will be over way to soon. Life is not easy, but I promise, it's worth it. Was it a line from Steel Magnolias? I think it was..."I'm not crazy, I've just been in a very bad mood forty years." Smile, sense beauty in all things, express gratitude, and experience forgiveness...Doc

The Human Conservancy...field office

"My greatest fear is not that I will have no one to care for me,
but I will have no one to care for."

I asked her about loss...

From Inside The Sane Asylum

So, to answer your question, when you try to tickle yourself, your cerebellum, which monitors your movements, basically calls off the whole tickle response system by letting it know the sensation it’s about to pick up is actually just you trying to make yourself laugh. Your not really going to try this are you?

Dr I. B. Thinking
Linguistic Medicine Man
The Sane Asylum

From The Farside Of The Glass...loneliness

The Innovation of Loneliness.

Could this world of social media and our ever expanding ‘friend’ circles may actually be making us more lonely? Could it be that being in control of the image we project of ourselves to others online, we aren’t being true to ourselves, thus making us feel more alone?

With the ability to edit, re-think and delete what we have said or posted, we craft our own image, paragraphs of text reformed and photos depicting only what we want people to see. We gather online friends like stamps and quantity has overtaken quality, with face to face interaction being minimized year by year. Could it be we are sacrificing conversation for connection?

Lemme Think About It...crazy

"Of all the poop in the world, who decided bat shit was the craziest?"

Jes B Rambling's Hallelujah Caravan...The Moral Of The Story

Jes...ONCE UPON A TIME THERE WAS A MAMA HORSEFLY, A PAPA HORSE-
FLY, AND A LITTLE BABY HORSEFLY. IT WAS NEARING SUPPERTIME,
AND THE FAMILY WAS LOOKING FOR SOMETHING TO EAT. AT THAT
MOMENT, THEY SPOTTED A FARM WITH HUNDREDS OF COWS IN THE
FIELD. THEY IMMEDIATELY FLEW INTO THE BRN, AND, BEHOLD!
IT WAS FILLED WITH TONS OF COW MANURE. THE HORSEFLIES
IMMEDIATELY STARTED EATING, AND THEY ATE AND ATE AND ATE
UNTIL THEY WERE SO FULL, THEY COULD NOT FLY AWAY. THEY HAD
TO GET OUT OF THE BARN BEFORE THE COWS CAME BACK, SO THE PAPA
HORSEFLY, SEEING A PITCHFORK STUCK INTO THE MAURE, SAID HE
WOULD CLIMB UP THE HANDLE AND TRY TO FLY AWAY FOR HELP.
HE CLIMBED UP THE HANDLE AND TRIED TO FLY AWAY, BUT HE WAS
SO HEAVY FROM EATING ALL THE COW MANURE, HE FELL DOWN AND
BROKE HIS NECK. THE MAMA HORSEFLY, WANTING TO SAVE HER
BABY, TRIED NEXT. BUT AFTER CLIMBING THE HANDLE AND TRYING
TO FLY AWAY, ALSO FELL DOWN AND BROKE HER NECK. THERE WAS
NOTHING FOR THE BABY HORSEFLY TO DO BUT TRY TO MAKE THE
ATTEMPT HIMSELF. BUT LIKE HIS MOTHER AND FATHER, HE WAS
SO FULL OF MANURE, HE FELL OFF THE HANDLE OF THE PITCH-
FORK AND BROKE HIS NECK. 

(PAUSE) 

Jes...DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS?
 DON'T FLY OFF THE HANDLE WHEN YOU'RE FULL OF SHIT.

Made Me Grin Series...a punny

THERE WAS AN INDIAN CHIEF NAMED SHORTCAKE. THE CHIEf WAS A BACHELOR, AND ONE DAY HE DECIDED TO GET MARRIED.
WELL, HE GOT MARRIED AND DIED ON HIS WEDDING NIGHT.
DO YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED THEN? SQUAW BURY SHORTCAKE....just punny. A little nonsense just went off in my brain...I will get better...sorry...:) Doc

Let Me Tell You A Story...James T. Callow's Folklore Archive

THE VIPER

ONE NIGHT A WOMAN WAS HOME ALL ALONE AND THE PHONE RANG.
SHE ANSWERED IT, AND A VERY WEIRD VOICE SAID, "I'M
THE VIPER AND I'M COMING TO YOUR HOUSE. I'M 3 MILES AWAY."
THE WOMAN WAS VERY FRIGHTENED, BUT NO ONE WOULD BELIEVE HER
ABOUT THIS PHONE CALL. THE NEXT NIGHT SHE ANSWERED THE
PHONE AGAIN AND THE SAME VOICE SAID, "I'M THE VIPER AND I'M
COMING TO YOUR HOUSE. I'M 2 MILES AWAY." AGAIN, NO ONE
BELIEVED HER. THE NEXT NIGHT HE CALLED AGAIN, AND SAID
"I'M THE VIPER AND I'M COMING TO YOUR HOUSE. I'M 1 MILE
AWAY. I'LL BE THERE TOMORROW." STILL NO ONE BELIEVED
HER. THE NEXT MORNING THERE WAS A TERRIBLE KNOCKING AT
THE DOOR. HER CURIOSITY OVERWHELMED HER AND SHE OPENED
THE DOOR. THERE STOOD A MAN WHO SAID, "I'M THE VINDA
VIPER, AND I COME TO VIPE YOUR VINDOWS."

Discovering Ourselves...wondering

I have no doubt that our thinking goes on for the most part without use of signs (words) and beyond that to a considerable degree unconsciously. For how, otherwise, should it happen that we sometimes “wonder” quite spontaneously about some experience? This “wondering” appears to occur when an experience comes into conflict with a world of concepts already sufficiently fixed within us. Whenever such a conflict is experienced sharply and intensely it reacts back upon our world of thought in a decisive way. The development of this world of thought is in a certain sense a continuous flight from “wonder.” 

A wonder of this kind I experienced as a child of four or five years when my father showed me a compass. That this needle behaved in such a determined way did not at all fit in the kind of occurrences that could find a place in the unconscious world of concepts (efficacy produced by direct “touch”). I can still remember — or at least believe I can remember — that this experience made a deep and lasting impression upon me. Something deeply hidden had to be behind things. AE

Stopped To Ponder...silence

In that moment, he learns what we so easily forget: that silence is not the absence of sound but the presence of an inward-listening awareness, an attunement of the mind’s ear and an orientation of the spirit toward a certain inner stillness — perhaps the positive counterpoint to loneliness, which so often thrives amid the crowd.